The Imposter with a Syndrome
The term “Imposter syndrome” is a rather familiar concept, one whose definition and expression can be conveyed by those who have experienced a foreignness that situates in oneself, a foreigness with a strongly convincing nature.
One popular symptom we associate with Imposter syndrome is “ Feeling like a fraud”. While it delivers a sense of accuracy it undermines the true and devastating effect it can have on oneself. It strips you of your sense of judgment, chips at your confidence, and convinces you that your imperfections are inexcusable.
I was subjected to a dose of imposter syndrome right after school, maybe three doses because its effects were crippling. The mask of my Imposter Syndrome was in the face of undermining the value of my work hence unable to share my projects and accomplishments over the years I have been active as a project manager. While I was confident with my ability to deliver and execute, I found myself in a mental spot that undermined the true impact of my work.
But this foreigner has occupied so much room that I am unable to accommodate it any longer. So now I have been intentional about proving it wrong, it says go left and I go right, it tells me not to jump and I jump, it convinces me not to write and I write because I realized every time I let it win, it took up space, it became unbearably heavy and limiting.
When Brianna West in her book “ The Mountain is You” described my mountain as a block between me and the life I want to live I finally understood that facing it is also the only path to my freedom and becoming. I recognized that my old self could no longer sustain the life I was trying to lead. Brianna encouraged that it was time for a reinvention and rebirth.
One of my mountains was feeling like an imposter in my craft. Not anymore because I didn't work this hard to be called an imposter. So I will be sharing my journey, both the good, the silly, and the ugly. A journey stirred towards making an impact.
